WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME...

For the last two days I have just been crying, crying and more crying. It's ridiculous. For good reasons, silly reasons, dumb reasons or no reason at all which is the most fun. I'm a pretty emotional person anyway, but honestly being pregnant makes me just an embarassing basket of crazy emotions. I'm at 30 1/2 weeks, and although I have had odd crying incidences on and off the entire time the last two days have been to the extreme. It's a triple shot of hormones. I am just hoping it calms down before I have to go back to work tomorrow b/c I don't want to have to explain that I am not crying for any reason while at my computer! Well on that note I am off to eat, b/c if I'm not crying I am usually eating or sleeping hahaha!

CAN'T KEEP UP

Ok, the double duty is too much. I am not updating this blog much less, both of my blogs, so with that sad news I am going to have to end this one. I will be focusing on keeping only the family blog updated from now. Thanks for reading.

MERRY CHRISTMAS

Merry Christmas to all this holiday season and the best wishes this coming new year! Sorry for my lapse in blogging but there is much to tell and I will post it soon. Hope you are all enjoying this wonderful holiday with those you love.

"And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people.

For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord."

~ Luke 2:10-11

TAKE A MOMENT

This past week has been crazy. There has been more going on then I can even explain but to give you just a slight idea of how my week has been progressing my camera, cell phone and fridge all died within 4 days of each other. My food is still in coolers in the garage! Things keep getting added to my "To-do" list faster than I can scratch them off. There have been many times where I just wanted to crawl in bed and hide, and even more when I was questioning why me. But then something happened: a dear friend suffered a terrible loss and suddenly all my "trauma" from the last few days was put into perspective. My trials were minial to the tradegy she and her family were now enduring. It caused me to stop, take a moment and be thankful for all the blessings in my life. To enjoy snuggling with my son and kissing my husband and really focus on all the good in my life and savor it. I encourage everyone to take a moment today to look around and take in all they have to be thankful for, we are all blessed.

CALLING ALL SMUG MARRIEDS

This Sunday I am teaching a lesson to all the young women about marriage standards, and setting your standards while still dating etc. So all you fabulously smug married women, whether you still are a newlywed or have past your silver anniversary, I need you to think back to your singleton days; what advice would you give other young women regarding dating/courtship on the road to finding your spouse? The advice can be serious, spiritual and even funny as long as it's true. Accompany stories, particularly the humorous kind as I don't want to be a boring teacher, are welcome as well. As always thanks for your help.

(So as not to be prejudice, if your husbands wish to offer some insights as well by all means their advice is welcome too)

Addendum:
In response to a comment I recieved regarding the title of this post, it is from a movie, a very funny movie at that and one of my favorites. I am not sure I want to be friends with people that don't have a sense of humor, but since they didn't leave their name all I can say is maybe YOU(whoever you are) should brush up on your movie quotes and get a sense of humor before you tell people to use a dictionary!

WHAT TIME OF CLEANER ARE YOU?

That's right I said time. I am not wondering how you clean b/c I know we all do. What I wonder is when, especially those with little and not so little ones to clean up after. At toddler gym the other day some of the moms were discussing the woes of feeling like they were constantly picking up after their kids. I can't do that, if I pick up after every mess he makes, I will be doing nothing but cleaning all day. I am a company/bedtime cleaner. While the big guy is giving the little guy a tubbie, I am running around the house picking up all the toys, laundry, books etc. So by the time he is out and ready for bedtime my house is all straightened as well. That's not to say I don't tidy a bit during the day, I do. I like to clean the dinner mess as quickly as possible and if there is someone coming over I do a quick tidy as well. But otherwise, the mess pretty much builds all day until the bathtime cleanup. There are a few reasons why this works me: one, b/c once the babe is asleep I want to relax but I can't if my house is dirty, I can't sleep either so this behooves me getting some rest which is always a good thing; two, if all is tidy at night that means all is tidy in the morning and each day starts fresh also very condusive to my sanity. So I was just wondering what TIME of cleaning works best for you and why?

NO FRIENDS ALLOWED HERE

Ok, I just have to ask; What the crap is up with bosses/managers not wanting us lowly co-workers to be friends? Honestly, what do they expect us to do? How are we suppossed to survive coming to the office everyday if we aren't allowed to joke, vent, laugh and lament about the goings on and politics of the office? It's okay, we aren't planning a coup. We also talk about our spouses, partners, kids, what we did over the weekend and even what we had for dinner last night. Can't they remember when they were one of us and used to interact and build relationships with co-workers to make the hours go by faster? Honestly does anyone have a valid and legitimate reason for this? And don't give me it's bad for productivity that is a load of crap and you know it. All right I am all ears.

HANDBAG LOVER'S ANONYMOUS

Hello, all my fellow handbag addicts. This is a fabulous opportunity for you to win a free new bag!!! No, I am not kidding. Handbag Planet is launching a new site and to celebrate they are giving away a bag each hour for 24 hours! I am so excited, and had to share. So check out this website and good luck! www.handbagplanet.com

FUDGY YUMMY GOODNESS WITHOUT GUILT!

I have just been introduced to the thick fudgy chewy deliciousness that is No Pudge Brownies. Oh my goodness they are too fabulous not to share. As many of you know, I love a good brownie. And the fudgier, thicker, and chewier the better. So imagine my surprise when my co-worker, thank you Laura, told me about this no fat brownie mix that she had just found that was actually good. Of course I had to run out and try it myself. She wasn't kidding. They are quick and easy too, all you add is some fat free plain or vanilla yogurt. So run ladies, run to the store and grab some because you know I wouldn't steer your wrong about yummy treats with little guilt! They have them in different flavors too although all I have tried so far is the original. Honestly they are so good I could eat the whole pan but have to remind myself that even though they are fat free they aren't calorie free, haha. On the website they tell you were you can buy them but so far I have seen them at Safeway, Thriftway and Fred Meyer's, I think they are getting pretty widely distributed now. So enjoy!

Ps- I just realized how much I sound like a cheesy commercial. Sorry for the cheese factor but I am still right about the brownies.

BLAH DAY

Lousy night sleep - check.
Humiliating and uncomfortable test - check.
Sad, runny nose, slight fever baby boy - check.
Pile of tasks too high to accomplish in one day on my desk - check.
Worked late - check.
Another night of not getting more boxes unpacked - check.

Like I said blah day.

HANDSFREE PRAYERS

Thankfully talking on your cell phone is not the only thing you can do handsfree while driving. Yesterday was a prime example. I had just hung up from my usual post-nap/lunch update with my mom. The little guy had slept good and happily ate his sandwich, all's well. However not 10 seconds after hanging up I get another call, my mom again, "You need to come home NOW! I locked myself out and V is alone in the house!"

I am sure you can imagine the panic that set in. I work at least a 15 minute car ride from home in perfect traffic, 20 minutes is more the usual. The entire ride I was gripping the wheel, eyes wide opening, praying. I arrive home barely putting the car into park before I run through the garage door screaming for my baby. No answer.

As I race down the hall my fears grow that the worst of the images that flashed through my mind on the drive home have come true, and still no answer to my calls. Slowly I start to notice that nothing seems out of place, and in fact the house is perfectly still. I wonder if maybe my mom managed to get back in and has taken him to her house and I didn't hear my cell ring. But then I round the corner to the kitchen...

To find my babe happily ensconced in his high chair, smiling and playing peek-a-boo out the kitchen window with Grandma who is on the front porch! For all my panic and worry the worst amounted to a spilt cup of milk. Hugs and kisses ensued although the recipient was oblivious to the reason for a surprise visit from Mama in the middle of the day with so much affection.

Not two minutes later our friend Jennifer pulls up too, not sure of what she can do, but as a good friend always does, answering the call for help none the less. Needless to say, plans were laid for any future lock-out incidents which hopefully will not occur. Thanks and hugs went around before I hopped back in the car for the return drive to work which found me again praying handsfree. This time a huge prayer of gratitude.

THANK YOU MY SISTERS

I received the following as an email and was more touched than I expected. As a woman who has walked that valley many times, I couldn't have expressed my gratitude better. I am eternally grateful for the sisters who cheered me, walked with me and even carried me out at times. Thank you all for you love, loyalty, laughter and friendship.

"A young wife sat on a sofa on a hot humid day, drinking iced tea and visiting with her mother. As they talked about life, about marriage, about the responsibilities of life and the obligations of adulthood, the mother clinked the ice cubes in her glass thoughtfully and turned a clear, sober glance upon her daughter. 'Don't forget your sisters,' she advised, swirling the tea leaves to the bottom of her glass. 'They'll be more important as you get older. No matter how much you love your husband, no matter how much you love the children you may have, you are still going to need sisters. Remember to go places with them now and then; do things with them.' 'Remember that 'sisters' means ALL the women... your girlfriends, your daughters, and all your other women relatives too. 'You'll need other women. Women always do.'

What a funny piece of advice!' the young woman thought. Haven't I just gotten married? Haven't I just joined the couple-world? I'm now a married woman, for goodness sake! A grownup! Surely my husband and the family we may start will be all I need to make my life worthwhile!' But she listened to her mother. She kept contact with her sisters and made more women friends each year. As the years tumbled by, one after another, she gradually came to understand that her mother really knew what she was talking about. As time and nature work their changes and their mysteries upon a woman, sisters are the mainstays of her life.

THIS SAYS IT ALL: Time passes. Life happens. Distance separates. Children grow up. Jobs come and go. Love waxes and wanes. Men don't do what they're supposed to do. Hearts break. Parents die. Colleagues forget favors. Careers end.

BUT......... Sisters are there, no matter how much time and how many miles are between you. A girl friend is never farther away than needing her can reach. When you have to walk that lonesome valley and you have to walk it by yourself, the women in your life will be on the valley's rim, cheering you on, praying for you, pulling for you, intervening on your behalf, and waiting with open arms at the valley's end. Sometimes, they will even break the rules and walk beside you...Or come in and carry you out. Girlfriends, daughters, granddaughters, daughters-in-law, sisters, sisters-in-law, Mothers, Grandmothers, aunties, nieces, cousins, and extended family: all bless our life! The world wouldn't be the same without women, and neither would you. When we began this adventure called womanhood, we had no idea of the incredible joys or sorrows that lay ahead. Nor did we know how much we would need each other."

THE GENIUS OF CRAIG

What a smart smart man he must be. Sitting in his apartment a few years ago and thinking "Wow wouldn't it be nice if people could buy, barter or even just give away their stuff." Why yes I think that is a fabulous idea. And we have been lucky enough to take advantage of his genius here and there, buying and selling. However, today's purchase has to be the most exciting and favored of our dealings. But first a little back story. We finally found a great rental home and as we have barely any furniture we have been making the rounds to the local furniture stores. Well at Cost Plus World Market we found some stuff we really liked including a large picture. Now it is rare that the husband and I agree on art, we have similar but not exactly the same taste. That whole colorblindness thing gets in the way, haha love you honey. Unfortunately this picture was mildly pricey and as we have more need for dressers, desk etc. than art it was put on the "wanted but not needed just now" list. But being me, I came home and decided to check out craigslist.org and see if any of the stuff we like was on there used. Nope, not the dresser. Nope, not the bed. Nope, not the desk. Nope, not even the bookshelf. But wait, what's that... the picture!!! Yep, the picture. So this morning we drove up north and SCORE!!! The picture was ours and for about 40% of what it cost in the store. Oh yes, that is the genuis of Craig. Only three more weeks and we can move in and hang it, yay!

SO FAR SO GOOD

Well I have done a few tests so far. And so far, I have passed; or failed I guess whichever way you want to think of it. Bottom line though is it doesn't appear to be the dreaded "c." Although they still aren't sure what is wrong but something is wrong. Now if they could just figure that out so I can get on with my life, not a big favor to ask I think, haha. Oh well, there are a few more tests to take and hopefully one of them will answer the question. Until then I am staying pretty calm and very busy so that helps.

THE "C" WORD

No not that "C" word, who do you think I am. The other "C" word, that one that strikes fear into your heart. No matter that the Doctor rambled off 4 or 5 things it could be besides that. That's the one that is stuck on repeat in my head. As soon as I heard it I had horrible images of leaving my husband a widower and my baby motherless. I have spent the day near tears worrying at the worst. In tears, praying that's not the case. Please not me. I love my husband. I love my son. We haven't had enough time. But first tests; tests to determine what is wrong. Maybe it's not that word, maybe it's one of the other things I had never heard of but are supposedly less harmful. But before we know we must test; test and wait. Except I am not good at waiting, I am not good at not knowing. If this is a trial I pray I can pass, I hope I can. Until then I wait for answers and try not to dwell on the "what ifs."

DEAL OR BETTER DEAL!!!

So we are finally feeling back to normal, or close enough at least. And just in time for the annual neighborhood garage sale. I have actually never done the garage sale thing. Maybe driven by one a few times, stopped here and there but I can't recall actually ever buying anything. Well that changed today. We were finding deal after deal after deal. The two best being a bike for the little guy. Yes, it is a tad big but it is the same one we saw in the store a few months ago and joked about how it has to be his first b/c it is so darn cute. Well score, we now own and for the low low low price of $4!!! That's right folks my boy's first bike with dual suspension and even his own little water bottle holder cost only $4. And it looks practically new, the training wheels have a little wear but honestly can you believe that price. The other best deal of the day was for the bigger boy in my life. I found him a golf caddie for $5! Yes, it's a little old school b/c it doesn't have the inflatable tires but compared to the new price of $130+ I think it will work just find. Plus when I go with him I get to use it, haha. Don't worry I didn't miss out on the goodies, I got three books to read for a total of $1.50, and a super cute wood bead bracelet for all of .25 cents! Overall I have to admit I had alot of fun though I don't think this will be a new weekend hobby anytime soon. It helped that it was a neighborhood sale so it was like window shopping in my own neighborhood, haha. I am looking forward to next year though and a little regretful I didn't grab that $10 telescope, shoot!

SICKIES 3: WELLS 2

Baby boy got sick on the plane ride home from vaca, all over me might I add. UCK! Now he has spread it to DH and Grandma. It's just me and my dad holding out, or I guess more correctly holding in! Hopefully we can stay healthy. Good news is baby boy is already feeling well and the husband is on the mend, so it seems to pass quickly. Wish us luck.

NATURE VS. NURTURE

Conversion 15 minutes ago:

Me: "Honey, be careful. You just swung him around and plopped him down like a sack of potatos."
Husband: "He is a sack of potatos."
Me: " He's not a sack of potatos, he's our son."

You decide.

SONGS, SONGS, MUSIC and SONGS

I am sure I am not the only one who does this, or this happens to, you hear a song and immediately it brings a memory or mood to mind. These can be broad or specific, people or places, good or bad. There are songs that remind me of my childhood like "What a wonderful world" by Louis Armstrong, or more specific my favorite song when I was 5 and we lived in Texas "Africa" by Toto. I still think that song is great. Some songs make me think of specific people. Even more so now two years after her death "You are my sunshine" makes me think of my grandma. I try to sing it to my son but can't always make it through with out starting to cry. So I was just thinking about how my life really could be set to music. I could easily write a soundtrack for each point of my life. Even my babyhood would be set to music as I still sing the same lullabyes to my son that my parents sang to me, Dad's choice "B a bae, b e bee" and Mom's "Leaving on a jetplane". My mother claims she didn't know any lullabyes and therefor sung me the only thing she knew the words too. One of my most favorite and few songs I can sing with out accompaniement to this day. There are songs that remind me of difficult times dealing with my past like Tori Amos's "Precious Things". There are songs that expressed exactly how I was feeling in my life, like after two years of trying and failing and failing and almost losing hope and then the joy of having my son, "A New Day" Celione Dion. But even more so now I find myself actually picking songs to suite the person, like theme songs. I took a quiz online once that told me my theme song is "Dancing Queen" by ABBA, a song I absolutely love but I think more fitting in my current life would be "I'm a woman" which if you don't know from Broadway you really should listen to as every wife, mother, hybrid mom can relate! Talk about multitasking! Speaking of children my son has a theme song in my head now whenever he is on the move, which is just about every waking second, it's the chorus of the 80's song "Break my stride":

"Ain't nothing gonna break my stride
Nobody's gonna slow me down
Oh no, I've got to keep on moving
Ain't nothing gonna break my stride
I'm running and I won't touch ground
Oh no, I've got to keep on moving"

It's so fitting as he is in constant motion and I can barely keep up. However I have a counter song, Simon and Garfunkel's "59th Street Bridge Song":

"Slow down, you move too fast
You got to make the morning last
Just kicking down the cobblestones
Looking for fun and feeling groovy
Ba da da da da da da, feeling groovy"

If it really came down to having to pick my life soundtrack by just one artist though that would have to be Sarah Mclachlan hands down. If I didn't know better I would swear she could read my mind and has been spying on my life. She is brillant and her music is beautiful. I have told my husband I would only leave him for two people, Sarah McLachlan and Jack Johnson! But only in pure innocence and fun and a slightly stalking fashion, I just want to follow them on tour and see every concert and then I would return to my fabulous husband as soon as the tour was over! The Beatles would be on that list too if it weren't for the sad facts that 1) they formed, conquered and broke up before I was even born and 2) only half of them are still living.
So, I am just wondering is all this mood music, memory music and theme songs make me odd? Am I the only person out there that does this? Honestly I probably have a song, or album in some cases, for most of my friends, places I have lived, jobs and definetly every major event in my life. So just for my sanity, does or can anyone else set their life to music too?

For those of you wondering, no my love of music and songs and such unfortunately doesn't transfer into any musical talent. However I would probably be a pretty good contestant on "Don't forget the lyrics" that's if anyone could stand to listen to me! And just for the record today was definitely a "Monday, Monday" by the Mamas and the Papas, haha!

TIME KEEPS ON SLIPPIN'

Just like my little guy couldn't catch the bathwater, today I definitely feel like I can't catch time. I can't believe my beautiful little baby is now officially a toddler, his first birthday! This past year has not always been easy but I feel so blessed to have him in my life and I wouldn't change a thing. I pray that the laughter has outweighed the tears. And I know that being his mother will continue to bring me more joy. Besides no matter how old he gets, he will always be my baby!
* Bonus points to anyone who can name the song and artist that the title of this post comes from.